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All quotes by Red and IMDb: Oh my gosh. You have no idea what you're missing. Try a grapefruit gusher. It's just like you today. A little sour. === She's (woman in painting) breathtakingly unattractive but she's worth over $40 million. The only Vermeer in private hands. ... Last night, I got up for a scoop of orange sherbet and she caught my eye. I just stood here in the dark squinting at her. Poor thing ruined my appetite. Even after I went back to bed, all I could hear was the hideous music she must be playing. Didn't sleep a wink. === I was a life guard my junior year in high school. Had to give mouth-to-mouth to Mrs. Beerman. She belched up a lung full of corned beef and chlorine. I haven't been in a pool since. === You can't judge a book by its cover. But you can by its first few chapters, and certainly by its last.